02
Sep
09

#95: Pulp Fiction

If they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese a “Royale with Cheese in France, then what do they call someone verging on a month of unemployment?  I’m what the French call “les incompetents.”

Pulp_Fiction_coverIf you haven’t guessed already, I had the pleasure of watching Pulp Fiction (#95) with my glorious girlfriend in Springfield over the weekend.  Normally, Amanda would pass on whatever monotonous marathon movie I planned on viewing.  My girl has simple tastes.  Here’s a checklist I usually run through in my head to see if a film is suitable for her viewing:

1. Is it 90 minutes long or less?

2. Is it funny?

3. Was it made before the year 1999?

4. Does it feature Mike Myers, Jim Carey, or anybody from a Wes Anderson movie?

If “yes” is the answer to every question, then it’s a guaranteed hit.  However, Pulp Fiction proves the formula wrong.  Did I mention we even watched her copy?

If you’ve been living under a rock, the film features a dynamite ensemble cast (John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, Uma Thurman, etc) as their characters intertwine through the California crime circuit. Ask any Aqua Teen Hunger Force fanboy about Pulp Fiction dialogue, and you’ll be met with a philosophical discussion.  This movie contains so many notable lines, the entire script is in the memorable quotes section on its IMDB page. It’s almost like the opening guitar lick of Dick Dale’s “Misirlou” signaled the piss-poor student film renaissance.

17191__pulp_fiction_l

Travolta and Thurman shaking their "groove things"

Girlfriends are good for watching movies with, but they’re even better for picking out job interview clothes.  Just like my mother did when I was six, Amanda entered the dressing room with me at Macy’s and helped me try on pants.  It really is a miracle I’m able to pick out a suitable outfit each morning.  When my girlfriend’s at the controls, my appearance magically goes from “Washed-Up College Grad Living with Parents” to…something better looking than that.  After changing in and out of half a dozen pants, we found the perfect pair.  Not too long, not too tight in my bulbous backside, and just the right color.  Add a spiffy marked down shirt and tie, and I had an outfit that says, “Hire me.”

Unfortunately, the job I interviewed for wasn’t as spiffy as my outfit.  I watched as employees sauntered the warehouse floor in worn T-shirts and jeans.  A woman from the accounting department shook my hand and jokingly commented that I was too dressed up for their office.

The company’s sporadic schedules, odd hours, and extensive travel didn’t sit well with me.  I’d be working freelance in a highly technical position with no other training than my experience at “Podunk University.” Hell, I’d even be driving rigs.  Some might have seen this as an opportunity for adventure.  But right now, my adventurous side wants to get an apartment and watch movies with my girlfriend.  That would be cool, just like a couple of little Fonzies.

Brett HeadBrett HeadBrett HeadBrett HeadBrett Head5 out of 5 Brett Heads

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